Forum: Story Discussion and Feedback

Have to re read Dance of a Lifetime, but don't remember if they were life time friends before they met.

Stories I am thinking have the girl and boy growing up together and the girl tells the boy to explore life/sow his oats before they can be together for life.

Somehow they meet other people to live life together/marry.

It's not quite that simple, as the main theme behind those stories is that the girl suggests "get some experience" and that I'll consider you, only once he does, he's already left the girl in the dust, having way more life experiences than she ever dreamed of (the whole big fix in a little pond situation, while the boy becomes a growing fish in an active sea of activities and relationships.

Thus it's a case of their seeing the world from their remote corner of it, thinking their too good for any rubes, never having experienced anything but their own small, limited lives.

But that's a theme in many classical stories too, except there, it's normally the father who sends his son out into the world before rewarding him with their minor kingdom.

It's not quite that simple, as the main theme behind those stories is that the girl suggests "get some experience" and that I'll consider you, only once he does, he's already left the girl in the dust, having way more life experiences than she ever dreamed of (the whole big fix in a little pond situation, while the boy becomes a growing fish in an active sea of activities and relationships.

I've been trying to find a story I saw years ago on asstr, I think. Maybe something like "Seasons"?

The guy is younger, just about to graduate HS, the girl in her early twenties, with some experience. She is ready to commit, but afraid she is just the guy's first crush, and doesn't want to get hurt when he changes his mind. So she tells him to go have some other relationship first, and if he comes back still wanting her, she will be all in.

Long story short, he has one date with a classmate, decides she still wants the older girl; and comes back to her. HEA.

It was novella-length, I think.

Have to re read Dance of a Lifetime, but don't remember if they were life time friends before they met.

He was not her First, she had a (controlling abusive asshole) boyfriend when they first met. He convinced her she could do better than that, even though he'd never had a girlfriend to that point.

That was what remember of the story. Meeting in teens, saving the girl, and staying together after.

Did you end up with your first girlfriend, boyfriend, or possessed toaster?

I thought it was a robot toaster.

Those are called hammers

Still friends with my first girlfriend after sixty years. Only friends(not site) through.

yeah, I've managed to stay friends (or at least friendly) with roughly half of my exes, but chances are the first person you date isn't going to be your long term partner. People grow and change over time and that is supposed to be the focus of coming of age stories so it would be more pronounced there

Yeah, I did it much sooner (college) but discovering you've taken someone's virginity by accident (i.e. not knowing what was at stake), is fairly haunting. If you know what you're getting into (no pun intended), you seek to minimize the damage. Worse, I was friends with the girl, who was trying to determine, whether she was hetero or gay.

She found out, but burdened by guilt, I was unable to maintain the friendship. She eventually found someone else (again, we were never a couple, as I was merely a willing patsy). I also liked her new girlfriend but again, have no clue how much she was told (relevant details), as it wasn't really something you can easily discuss.

I have used the emotional response of that in several stories, making my characters more aware of the potential repercussions and actively weighing the odds, yet I could never write about the actual experience. As how do you write how blind, stupid, ignorant or foolish you are, nor describing the overwhelming guild.

Again, if she'd merely said "Hold on, before we start …" I'd have been fine. But that's my cross the bear, no one else's. They made their choices, and I've bourn the responsibilities of mine. (Yet another reason not to sleep with friends you have no real desire for.) Being a patsy doesn't really held that utter sense of helplessness.

For her, it was a few longish moments of pain, but I've also considered each time I've started a new relationship. But then, I've always been a classic serial monogamist. I don't mind informed consent (allowing one's partner to sleep with someone else) but I'm not the one to seek a sexual partner like that (aside from sex clubs, where everyone is well aware of WTF they're doing).

Now that's fodder for some great stories, but all of my sex scenes involve some form of weighing the potential costs. Though, like my one-time partner, most are more than willing to completely ignore them, while I felt like I was hoodwinked rather than merely blindsided. (P.S. She hated the entire experience, which made her decision much easier.)

And yes, she did look much like you'd expect, very stereotypically a bull-dyke lesbian.

Or squishy ball.

Will have to read it. Keep seeing his stories pop up, but it never caught me and other stories got in the way.

I met my wife in college, and we married about a year later. After 24 years of marriage and two kids, she told me "I still love you, but for my mental, physical and emotional health I can no longer stay married to you." No reasons/explanation, just the bald statement.

Yep, that was my case ("I love you, I just can't stand living with you anymore.") though we talk almost all the time (hours worth several times a week)—which is more than I can say for most married couples).

When someone needs a break, they'll invent any excuse to get away. The key is to give them their freedom and then see whether they return or not (i.e. giving them enough rope to hang themselves with).