I have a dirty little secret like many of you men who are reading this story. By day, I am a married, masculine man. I am married to a wonderful woman who has adored me for twelve years. To her and to my friends, I'm a burly, bearded, talented musician about six feet tall and weighing 200 pounds. They all know me as a gentle, friendly guy. But in private, I'm a closet queer. I don't like to use the word "gay" because I think that word minimizes what we are; homosexuals. The truth is that I like all things male. I like the looks of a man, his body, his face, and especially, his cock.

I have been queer since I was ten years old. When I started masturbating at that age, I didn't fantasize about girls and women. I fantasized about boys and men. I wanted to be around males as much as possible. I was a Boy Scout for several years and I loved to go on camping trips where I might see my fellow Scouts swimming naked. I wanted nothing more than to suck all their cocks, but I was too afraid to initiate anything.

I have lived as a straight man all my life with many girlfriends, several wives and stepchildren, but if I had the nerve, I would have preferred to live the "queer life." I was sexual with all these women and I was a good lover, but I always had a yen for men. More than once I had to use the fantasy of sex with a man to get off with my female lovers.

I started exploring my homosexuality when I was thirty-five. I would go to my favorite adult theater, "The Paradise," to watch gay porn and have sex. The Paradise is two theaters in one; a straight theater and a gay theater. Most of the patrons start in the straight theater, but within minutes they migrate to the gay theater. This is where I got all my illicit sex.

One night I was at the theater looking for something. I'm always nervous about having anonymous sex, but I do like to watch other guys doing it. That particular night, there was one guy who was trying to suck off every guy who was willing and he got quite a few takers. I had my cock out and I masturbated while I watched the action, but I stopped when I got close to cumming. To my surprise, an old man, about seventy years old, appeared beside me with a paper cup in his hand.