Chapter 83: Winding Down; Moving Forward

February 26, 1988, McKinley, Ohio

The last full week in February, which was the first week of Great Lent, had been typical of the previous three, with very little of note happening at the hospital. Rachel and I had traveled to Columbus to see Dani on Sunday, I’d had dinner in the cafeteria with Maryam and had dinner with Kari, which also included fooling around. Kylie had visited on Wednesday, though it was just a hookup, and she didn’t stay for dinner. I’d also had dinner with Sara, but the timing didn’t work for us to get to second base, as Rachel was awake almost the entire time Sara was at the house.

On Friday, I had lunch with Tami and it was abundantly clear from the conversation that she was not interested in a long-term relationship at this stage in her life, though she did drop hints she was available, if I was interested, though I chose to let them go, as I didn’t need nor want another casual sex partner when I was working on winding down some of those relationships.

That included Susana, who arrived at the house at 5:30pm, after I’d taken Rachel to my in-laws so that Susana and I could spend our last night together uninterrupted. I’d pick up Rachel after band practice, take her to her checkup, then head home to join Oksana.

“Could we order pizza?” Susana asked. “We’ll have more time!”

“Yes,” I said. “What would you like?”

“Pepperoni, if that’s cool.”

I agreed, then placed the call, receiving a promise of forty minutes or less.

“Forty minutes, max,” I said. “But it’s usually closer to thirty.”

“That’s enough time!” Susana declared. “I want to feel you without the rubber!”

I wasn’t about to refuse! We rushed upstairs, hurriedly removed our clothes, and jumped into bed. Just the briefest foreplay with mutual oral sex was all it took for both of us to be ready, and I savored the wonderful silky feel of Susana’s tunnel as I slid into her. We screwed hard and fast, with Susana begging me to cum in her, and after about six minutes, I obliged, bathing her insides with hot, sticky cum.

“Oh, God,” she gasped. “So warm!”

A second later Susana tightened her arms and legs around me, groaned, and had a strong orgasm.

“Amazing,” she panted.

We didn’t have a lot of time, so we got out of bed, showered, dressed, and went downstairs. The pizza arrived about five minutes later, and after I said the blessing, we dug in.

“This may well be the last time,” I said to Susana after we’d each polished off a slice of pizza.

“Irina told me,” Susana said. “I knew it would happen sooner or later, and you know I’m not going to be ready to marry for at least three or four years. I agree with Irina that Sara is the best choice, and that’s all I’ll say because I know you don’t want anyone telling you what to do.”

“For the same reasons?” I asked.

“I actually don’t particularly like Oksana. I mean, we get along fine, but she’s not really a friend. We just don’t click the way Irina, Sara, Debby, Vickie, and I do. I didn’t really click with Elizaveta, either, because by the time she was old enough to really hang out with us, she was betrothed to you, so I think that might have been part of it. I really liked her, and we got along well, but with her being a matushka, well, I think you get the picture.”

“I do. Clergy and their wives are treated very differently, which is what Lara’s problem was.”

“You’d have married her if that hadn’t been true, right? That’s what the rumor mill said.”

“Probably. And we did discuss it again after Elizaveta reposed, but there’s a difference in piety and praxis.”

“Honestly, that would be my concern, too. My family is super strict, but I’m not. I mean, I’m Orthodox and I’m not changing, and I’ll attend church with my kids, but I’m nowhere near as serious about it as you are. I think Dani is probably the most serious, then Oksana, then Sara, but it’s like a matter of degrees, not a huge difference. The most devout girl I know is Natalie, but there’s something weird about her I can’t figure out. You totally weren’t interested in her, were you?”

“Correct.”

“I know Maryam is very devout, but I think she has the same problem you do with medical training, and I can’t imagine what that would look like combined, so I guess it’s no surprise you guys aren’t seeing each other. I mean, when would you?”

“To confirm the difficulty, we had dinner together in the hospital cafeteria while she was on-call for surgery and I was off shift. It’s like having time to see Clarissa, Peter, Sophia, Robby, and my other friends. Heck, I just saw the friend I first made in kindergarten for the first time in months because she’s in law school.”

“You need a stay-at-home mom type like Elizaveta,” Susana said. “And that fits Sara, Oksana, and Dani. But not me nor Irina, for sure. Or Maryam.”

Or Becka, I thought. And while that wasn’t a primary criterion, it did factor in.

“Something to consider,” I replied.

“What about Tasha? You guys dated before, and we all thought maybe she was going to scoop you up immediately. Nik Antipov is a total asshole and I have no clue what she saw in him, and I think the divorce pretty much proved that.”

It didn’t, and I couldn’t correct her because I couldn’t share the reasons she was mistaken. Nik was a legalist, but he wasn’t an asshole. He’d been misled, thinking he was getting the opposite of what he actually got. For some guys, a sexually free wife, willing to do or try anything, and constantly seeking pleasure, would be a pleasant surprise; for Nik it was an outrage.

“Tasha needs a husband who can pay more attention to her and the family than I’ll be able to for at least the next four or five years. We both know that would go badly. And she does have her eye on someone.”

Susana smiled, “Chris Reed, the catechumen who’ll be chrismated on Holy Saturday. She’s been sitting with him at coffee hour, but hasn’t stood next to him in the nave.”

“I suspect she’s waiting for him to be chrismated. Do you know what he does?”

“He’s assistant manager at the Kroger in Rutherford. Not bad for twenty-six. He went to Miami of Ohio for a business degree, got a job at Kroger and is working his way up. Rumor has him being the next store manager.”

“That’s good.”

We each had a second slice of pizza, then I put the leftovers in the fridge.

“We have from now until about 7:00am,” I said. “That’s when we need to be in the shower so we can say morning prayers and I can get to band practice.”

“I want to feel you cum in me a bunch! But I love when you cum on my face and lick it off! And I love sixty-nine!”

“Decisions, decisions,” I teased.

“Once between my boobs, then alternate sex and sixty-nine, but only cum in my mouth once. We stop sixty-nine right before you cum, and you cum inside me instead.”

“I’ll do my best!”

“Nine more times if we manage the time and naps correctly!” Susana exclaimed. “Let’s go!”

February 27, 1988, McKinley, Ohio

Susana had totally worn me out, but it had been fun and though I was totally drained sexually, I wasn’t exhausted because we’d taken naps between rounds, and I’d had about four hours of sleep, total. I could function on that without any trouble, and with Oksana visiting later, I’d be able to get a full night’s sleep before the drive to Columbus to see Dani.

Susana and I had an enjoyable shower, which gave me one last chance to fondle her stupendous breasts, and then we said morning prayers together. Susana and I exchanged a kiss at the door, then she drove off and I walked to Taft for band practice. Just over two hours later, I walked home to find Oksana cleaning. We hugged, I stowed my guitar and music in the study, then left the house so I could get Rachel and take her for her checkup.

“She’s very healthy,” Doctor O’Neill said when she completed her exam. “Third dose of DPT today.”

“Which will make her just as unhappy as she was two months ago!”

“You’d both be far more unhappy if she contracted pertussis!”

“True, though I doubt she has a clue of the importance of someone sticking her with a needle at this stage!”

“I’d say it’s doubtful! How far can she crawl?”

“Across the rug in the great room. I usually spread her toys on the floor and she crawls to them, or to me or one of the girls who helps care for her. When she’s tired, lazy, or just wants to be pampered, she says ‘DA!’ to let me know I’m supposed to jump. I just have to figure where and how high!”

“Do you read to her?”

“I started about two weeks ago, but before that she was in my arms when I read my prayers, the Scriptures, and the lives of the saints during morning and evening prayer.”

“How is she with grasping? She did fine with my finger.”

“She can get a death grip on her rattle and I have to pry it out of her hand if she doesn’t want to let go.”

“Good. Anything that would indicate vision, hearing, or motor problems?”

“None.”

“Then I’d say I’m happy. Any questions before Sally administers the vaccine?”

“What solid foods should I give her?”

“Start with applesauce or puréed peaches,” Doctor O’Neill advised. “Don’t give her too much to start with, and don’t be surprised if she spits up at first. You can also try Cheerios, which will soften in saliva and she can gum, and you can also let her gnaw on bagels. Be careful with added sugars other than what’s in bread and avoid the processed baby foods at this point. Once she’s handling the fruit, you can try tapioca.

“Make sure, though, that she has her full bottle before you give her the solid food, because what you don’t want is her to have insufficient nutrients because she decides she doesn’t want the bottle. Make the solid food a reward for drinking her bottle for now. As she gets closer to a year old, you can switch the order, but again, you have to make sure she’s eating enough.

“When she decides she’s basically had enough of bottles, then introduce other soft foods, and limited processed baby food, sticking to things like carrots and peas, but again, make sure you avoid anything with added sugar. If you’re adventurous, and you have a food processor, you can make your own and know for sure what she’s actually eating.”

“No cow’s milk, right?”

“Not until she completely gives up the bottle. You don’t want her substituting for the most nutritious thing she can have until she can eat solid foods. Juice in a sippy cup is OK, but again, watch the quantity because it’s very high in sugar, and stay away from citrus until she’s potty trained. You’ll thank me for that advice!”

“She’s had a few diapers that the EPA could declare as SuperFund sites!”

Doctor O’Neill laughed, “No matter how healthy they are, and how well they eat, all babies can have what amounts to toxic waste in their diapers, and I don’t mean normal feces. If that happens too often, her diet needs to change. That’s less a problem for you than a nursing mom who has to change her diet in those instances.”

“OK. When do you want to see her again?”

“In six months, unless something concerns you. If so, call to make an appointment and we’ll discuss it. If she continues growing and shows no developmental delays, then the norm is at her first birthday. We’ll do the first MMR and third polio dose then. That said, it’s safe to give her the MMR today if you want. I offer that for babies who aren’t nursing, as their immune systems don’t have the advantage that nursing babies do.”

“What’s your advice?”

“There isn’t anything in the literature which contraindicates it. If I hadn’t been able to nurse my daughter, I’d have done it.”

“Then let’s do that. Miss Rachel can be doubly cross again today!”

“Sally, DPT and MMR, please.”

“Yes, Doctor,” Sally, a Fourth Year planning to match for pediatrics, replied.

“See you at the hospital, Mike,” Doctor O’Neill said. “And see you in six months, young lady!”

“As the doctor slinks quietly from the room so as not to be blamed for the shot...” I smirked.

“Actually, there is something to that,” Doctor O’Neill replied. “I always have medical students do it because they usually change between appointments, and that keeps the babies and toddlers from becoming instantly stressed when they see me or the nurse.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” I replied.

“An addition to your bag of tricks, Kid Whisperer?”

I laughed, “I’m not surprised Doctor Casper has spread that nickname.”

“You’d be a natural in Pedes, but you’d also be bored out of your skull. You can count on getting all the Pedes and teen cases in the ED, though, that’s for sure!”

“That won’t bother me in the least,” I replied. “I can do without the ‘hold my beer and watch this’ crowd!”

“You and me both!” Doctor O’Neill said, shaking her head. “During my trauma rotations, I saw some of the dumbest things imaginable, and every time I thought ‘nobody can top that’, someone did! My favorite is still the guy who claimed that the lightbulb in his rectum got there because he fell off the ladder while changing a bulb and landed on it.”

“Right, because I always change all my bulbs in the nude!” I chuckled.

“Among other problems with that story!”

“Such as how did it get lubricated?” I asked.

Doctor O’Neill nodded, “That was one I asked. It fell in some lube that had spilled on the floor.”

“OK, then,” I said, shaking my head in disbelief, but believing that she’d actually been given that answer.

Doctor O’Neill left and Sally returned with the hypos. Rachel became suspicious as soon as I put her back on the table and fussed as I took off her onesie to expose her upper thigh for the shot. She squealed and cried after each injection, and it took me five minutes to calm her down, though she gave me the evil eye the entire time. Once she’d stopped crying, I went to reception and made an appointment for late August, though I knew I might have to change it, depending on my schedule.

The appointment made, Rachel and I left the medical building, then headed home. At home, I greeted Oksana, who was making lunch, then put a still cranky Rachel on the floor of the great room. I went upstairs to change clothes, then returned downstairs to find Oksana cradling Rachel.

“She’s very unhappy,” Oksana observed.

“Two vaccine jabs,” I replied. “MMR and DPT.”

“Lunch is ready if you’re ready to eat.”

“I am. She needs a bottle.”

“I’ll take care of that, if she’s OK with it.”

“She’s probably more than a bit unhappy with me at the moment, so I think that’s a safe bet. She likes you, and you haven’t taken her to be probed, prodded, and stuck with needles!”

She’d also missed her morning nap, so I suspected she’d take an evening nap. I wanted to make sure she wasn’t cranky for the drive to Columbus, so I’d do my best to make sure she had enough sleep.

“Then come to the kitchen, please.”

I followed Oksana to the kitchen and sat down to a plate of spaghetti with marinara sauce, as we were officially in Great Lent. My rule was relatively lax, but Oksana was following the standard rule with the meal she’d prepared. I actually had no idea what rule she followed, and decided to ask, which was appropriate, as we were in a relationship.

“What’s your fasting rule, if you’re willing to share?” I asked.

“I am. No meat. Dairy is OK. You follow the strict monastic rule, right? That’s why I didn’t set out Parmesan cheese.”

“Normally, in the past, yes, though once I married, the joint rule Elizaveta and I were given took into account our plans to get pregnant, and later, her pregnancy. Since then, I’ve been on very lax rules, assigned first by Father Nicholas, then later by Father Roman. Part of it is due to the demands of my medical training, part of it is because I was mourning, and part of it is to teach me lessons about obedience.”

“What’s your rule?”

“No beef, no candy, and no carbonated drinks. You know the basics of my prayer rule, though it also includes repetition of the Jesus Prayer as often as possible.

“Can you explain what you mean about obedience?”

“Yes. For me, fasting and following my prayer rule come easy, and I followed the toughest rule as a teenager to prove to myself I could do it, and it became a habit. It’s more difficult for me to not do it than to do it, which was something Father Nicholas and Father Roman figured out. I want to follow the rule strictly, which, in a sense, is missing part of the point.

“The key is teaching me to accept and follow spiritual direction, something that comes much harder for me. I doubt Elizaveta shared anything, but I managed to get in all kinds of trouble as a deacon, not for anything sinful I did, but for how I responded to things that happened. That was also true before I was ordained, so Father Roman is trying his best to help me with temperance.”

Oksana had prepared Rachel’s bottle and sat down at the table. I said the blessing, and then we began eating while Rachel happily suckled her bottle.

“Rachel’s pediatrician said it’s OK to start her on unsweetened applesauce and puréed peaches,” I said. “So I’ll pick those things up at the store, along with Cheerios. I’ll also stop at Goldberg’s Deli because they sell bagels, which Doctor O’Neill says are good for Rachel to gnaw on.”