Chapter 179

“Robbie, it doesn’t make sense for you to take any of the blame,” Terra said once I had finished giving her the rundown of what had happened with the cop. I hadn’t held back anything other than my suspicions at the time that Cassidy had used the App somehow. I’d even told Terra about seeing Cassidy peeking down and giving me the thumbs up.

Well, there was one other thing I didn’t tell her, or not fully.

I felt shitty about the whole thing.

It was tough to talk about while dancing around the App. Well, maybe it wasn’t that tough.

“I blame myself for taking advantage of that woman,” I said. “She didn’t choose what her partner was going to do. And that cop was pissed because of something Cassidy and I did or else he never would have stopped us to begin with.”

“But you didn’t ask her for sexual favours, or demand them,” Terra said. “She offered it.”

“That doesn’t mean it was right, Terra,” I said. OK, maybe it wasn’t so easy after all.

“It doesn’t make it wrong, either,” she said. “If I said I wanted to fuck, would you do it?”

“Terra, I would rip your clothes off and have my way with you in any way that you wanted,” I said. “But knowing what I know about you and JC, I wouldn’t ever want to break your agreement. And I was part of him doing that.”

“God, Robbie,” Terra sighed. “That isn’t the question I asked. Your answer was yes, you would fuck me if I asked. So what’s the difference between me asking and that officer asking?”

“ ... Leverage?” I hedged. “She felt like she needed to buy us off. You and me, there’s nothing weird that isn’t from our relationships. If you and JC didn’t have an agreement then there would be because you’d be asking me to keep a secret.”

“Did she leave upset?” Cassidy asked.

“Uh, no,” I said. “I don’t think so.”

“So get out of your head,” Terra said. “From everything you described, she had a blast. Reenacted some old situations. She’s probably getting herself off right now thinking about your cock. Knowing what I know about you from our little talks, and what Cassidy says, I know this probably isn’t going to really help, but I’m going to say it anyways - It’s not your fault, Robbie. But what JC did is his fault and not yours.”

“It’s partially mine,” I fought back.

“God, fuck, Robbie,” Terra sighed. “Stop being a martyr and let me be mad at my boyfriend.”

“I don’t know if I would have reminded him if I thought about it,” I admitted.

Terra blinked, frozen for a long moment. “What do you mean?” she asked.

Now it was my turn to bury my face in my hands, scrubbing at it to try and get my thoughts together. I finally sighed and looked up at her. “Terra, you and I have been flirting hard since the first day of this trip. I think you are an amazing, energetic person who loves to take risks and wears her heart on her sleeve. You are playful, you are caring, you’re sweet and kind and know how to adjust when someone needs one thing or the other. And God, you are a sexual being. You are utterly sexy, and gorgeous, and I want to fold you up into a pretzel and fuck the shit out of you, and lay you down and kiss you all over and make love to you at the same time. Even with everything else going on, I want you, Terra. And I’m not used to any of this. I don’t know how to act or be around you girls because sometimes everything is just normal and I’d be happy just being friends with you all, but then I’m massaging naked breasts and getting kisses that make me tingle down to my toes and back, and I’m going on little dates and having nasty sex and Cassidy is totally OK with it and encouraging it almost too much and I don’t know which way is up and who is-”